did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
