Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
Dude, this old lady messaged me on Facebook talking about her grandson and wanted to know shit about me. I'd almost call her a cougar except she looks like mashed potatoes that have come alive.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
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