too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
