Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
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