you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
