i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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