Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
Randomize
