I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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