I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize