Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
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