Whats the count minus fat chicks?
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Randomize
