This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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