Sry I called you an 8
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
