Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
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