what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
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