i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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