im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
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