He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
You're a waste of cheezeits
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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