pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Found half of a five day old piece of pizza behind my dresser. Apparently it was drunkenly set there and got knocked down. It was such a happy reminder of last weekend.
I found a cheeseburger next to my tub once. It's there to shame you, but it always just makes me feel more awesome.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Randomize
