six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
