eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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