can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
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