I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
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