I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
