is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
Randomize
