he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize