and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
