But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I just made a cocktail. Had one shot of vodka left. It looked lonely so I decided to reunite it with its vodka friends in my bloodstream.
Starting the day at 1:44 in the afternoon. With a hot pocket and a mixer. Who knew my life had this kind of possibility.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
