After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
