I want to stick my p in your. b.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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