It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Randomize