"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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