I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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