ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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