i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
