You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Randomize