he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
