I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
I just gargled with NyQuil
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