Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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