pedialite and red bull = repair kit
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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