Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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