i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
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