Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
