I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
the night ended with taco bell and tears
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize
