My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
