office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Randomize
