can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Randomize
