I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Randomize