I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
