It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize
